Dear Saruman
Sorry PJ cut you from
The Return of the King
Read the books
Was hoping to see Wormtongue
Rip your throat out
After the Hobbit's return
From their epic adventure
Destroying the one ring that binds them
But, PJ is making these movies
To entertain the kids
Not the adults who once were children
Who grew up lost in Tolkien's world
So PJ's chosen
To have an infinite amount
Of pointless endings
That will most probably piss the viewer off
But, we're hoping that after three hours
The cinema goer will feel
They've got their moneys worth
And not miss your absence from the silver screen
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